Boy, what a conversation it was. She described to me some of the students in one of her classes, which included a guy who came in a black trench coat every day even though it was hot outside, a gay student who was judged by his classmates and who was dealing with depression, two girls who she didn't know were girls until the first progress report, and a girl who brought her pet snake to school every day. All. in one. class.
The biggest lesson that Mira said she learned was to not judge her students. If you can do that, you will earn their respect. I asked her what she meant by not judging, and she said that it just means to accept them as who they are, and that way they will open up to you. If you judge them for what they do or how they act, they're simply not going to trust you or respect you.
Another piece of advice she gave me was to not try to be your students' friend. She said that some teachers try to be on their students' level, but she said that simply doesn't work for her because her students grew up in a totally different generation. On her first day of class, one of her rules was No Walkmans In Class. Immediately her student asked, "What's a walkman? I think you're old." Mira thought it was hysterical. Even though I've only been out of high school for 4 years, that's a long time for pop culture and high school trends to change. If I try to pretend like I know what my students are talking about, I'm gonna be made a fool.
Another thing she did was tell her students that if they were going to come late to class, then they shouldn't come at all. The reason is because when a student walked in late, that disrupted the entire class and it would take forever for them to settle down again. That seems pretty strict but maybe that got the late-comers to come on time, I'm not sure because I forgot to ask. Anyway her point was that you need to have a consistent routine in the beginning of each class, and she hated for that to be messed up.
Apparently her students loved her. The depressed student would talk to her during lunch, and her students would always invite her to come to their sports games. While she was a substitute teacher, the principal told her that whenever the actual teacher informed the students that Mira would be the substitute, the class would erupt in cheer. This was all great until a couple students took her "coolness" way too far. Here's a fun story.
At 11:45, Mira was on her lunch break and went outside to see a car that had smoke pouring out the sides. She said it looked like Cheech and Chong's ride.
Sitting inside the car were two of her students who yelled, "Hey Ms. ____! Do you wanna take a hit??" as they stuck a joint out the window. Although it was a nice gesture, Mira said she had no choice but to report them to the principal. Why? I asked. Didn't you feel bad about it? She said that now there was the risk of rumors leaking out about her getting high with her students, so in order to eliminate that risk she had to report them. That resulted in the two students getting kicked off the baseball team, as well as holding a personal vendetta against her. Understandably.
So for a while these two students wouldn't talk to her at all. They walked into her class, saw that she was teaching since she was a substitute at the time, and immediately walked out. Then finally one day she initiated a conversation with them, and explained to them that she had to do what she did. She also talked to them about their futures and about how getting high now in a car during school hours might seem cool but in seven years will make them losers. After that conversation, they were cool again and she regained their respect.
So biggest lesson learned from Mira? Don't judge my kids. If I do, they'll close off, which is definitely not what I want. Thanks for the advice Mira!
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